stubbornness overrules

That one moment when i thought everything was fine again. that i can move forward and do what ever I want. I hate the feeeling of when I know that everything I thought is all wrong and that its just not as easy as I make it sound.

Im sorry, Im stuck between confusion ad my stubborness. I want to know what i want. I mean, with 'being young' in my mind all the time really makes me move forward and expect myself to d new things and thing I want to do. I dont want to hold myself back from everything.

I know how lost I m sounding on this blogpage of mine, but I just want everyone to know that Im not really fine even though I say I am :\ I dont know why, but its a natural instinct fo my answer to be 'I'm fine' when im asked if somethings wrong.

Yes, I do smile for the sake of it and not that I always am happy. Everyone knows for how happy and cheerful I am .. but maybe its because I put my wall up - I'd rather be known for my happy times rather then how upset I can really be. For you guys, for my friends - & for those i love. I don't want them to worry over me and have a hard life when life is already hard the way it is.

What am i blabbering on about? Yeah, i cried again - where were you?

BE IN THE MOMENT

I mean, a Sunday weekend and im sitting here at home being nerdy and doing my homework? Boy, that doesnt sound too good. I dont know why, but I've been living on this inspiring note recently.

'In life, live for the moments, be in the moment!'

Like the image below of the post it note, I love it. It sends out the message loud and clear. I've been making others take note of it too. So if your feeling down, sad and or mooody - go do something your not going to regret not doing later in life. Be in the moment!

My birthday is exactly in 7days and my party is just one day after it. So I am quiet excited for the sweet ass 16th :) Though right now, i am busily getting thing in place and so nothing will go terribly wrong or that i've forgotten someone or something (H)

Currently, i am trying to completely my english book chapter questions into my excercise book. As you can tell, major epic fail because im sitting her majorly blogging my thoughts away instead. Hm, how's the world doing atm?

What can i say? Im still in my happy moood, im happy with myself, im happy with the things an the people around me. It feels good to hear that you care again, still and what can i say? I feel a litle guilt inside knowing that what I have now is something I havent worked hard for - something that i know i just dont deserve.

But since I have it and it now belongs to me - I will try to keep it and not take it for granted. I want it to know that I am worth staying and hanging for.

I think I should be heading back to my english. Finish off my To Do list for today, eat my brains out and finish a few more episodes of Gossip Girl.

take care and stay safe while im not there

you know you love me. xoxo

when life gets hard, fuck it

I want more of those days where i could laugh hysterically endlessly. I like reading Fml's because even though some of them a quiet lame - at the end when i exit the page i'd still be smiling like a freak because they have a life thats' worth sharing .. living a worthful life. I mean live life for the moments .. because you'd just end up regreting what you havent done rather then what you have done.

Right now, I am drinking my asian ice coffee and should be sticking my nose into Lord of the Flies as my english study book since I am nine chapters behind and 7 chapter questions behind :L How much of a good school girl do i sound? Not really aye?

Im in a much more happier mood right now. I feel as though I have been able to settle all of the hardship thats been happening.

I cried last night, I cried so much that i just feel asleep without realising it. I cried for the fact of loosing him - but im a stubborn little child (like someone who always calls me that .. you know who you are fagface) But now i've got it all under controll - we talked and talked about it. I find myself in a much happier status so I hope im not hallusinating and it really all is going to be okay.

Thank you and muchly credit to Wesley Tran, Hien Nguyen for being the friend i leant on in this time because i muchly so appreciate it. When life gets hard, fuck it

I was intending to clean out, fold and iron my wardrobe today because its in such a messy state but i have way way too much homework to be spending my time cleaning something i know will just end up in the same state as before i cleaned it :)

Just a quick update, I hope your all happy and have a lovely weekend guys

lighten up a little whill yah'

For fuck sakes. If you trusted me little then there is no need for me to having to tell you everything i do. Does it matter that much to you? Your saying that nothings' ever important to me anymore - but what are you? Why does everything have to be so important to you now?

You, you should know how much i dont like people telling me what to do. How much I hate it when people get judgementals about the things I do. But then what do you do? You turn around and do the same thing as they do.

How often did we have a fight? How often did I shed tears .. how often did you disappoint me back then? What is it all now? Im alway the one accussed for changing, for the bad reputation but your the one that causes it all.

Theres' no point in promissing me anything from now on -cause you never give a shit about your promisses to me. Its all what others think and how they see me. If you dont want people to judge bad about you girlfriend then FINE!

I dont care, I try not to care - cant i just be happy for the whiles i can? Your hurting so much more then you think you do. & it also because I care about how you think but stop taking advantage of it. Dont bore me out - you know how im like but you still choose to ignore it

fall-ina (8)

I think there is something wrong with the html layout of my paragraphs for my posts therefore I apologize for the crowding up of space on my writting for the past two blogs. How was your day? Its wierd because I leave asked questions not intending to gt replies on comment sections or my tagboard - I intend to want you to ask yourself, how was your day?

'cause i do, when i come across questions- I ask myself it and i come up with really wierd answers. I studied pretty late last night and intended to wake up early today to do abit more studying but i couldn't get up early enough :P So i woke up normal time and got ready for school. The test was alright, im excited to see the results.

Happy dear ol' birthday to my great friend Wesley Tran turnig 16 today :) Hope you had an aweesome one and all the best. xo! My brother fully tried to smash my computer monitor today by throwing his glass cup at the screen but then luckily it only hit the frame but then it knocked over my speakers /rages!

What shall i blog about? I should be doing Modern History at this moment but mehhh, once again i tend to lazy out of homework and intend to blog instead of doing it :P its a Saraah thing aye aye? NO IM NOT LAZY! .. i know what you guys are thinking- you know who you are :L

Im still young, let me be out there and do what i want to do. Times' flying faster then you'll ever realise and there are just things you cant do later in life. I want to party hard, get drunk, dance all night long. Yeah, we can all do that later in life - but as a teenager let it be like that. I know you care, but .. dont get tooo controlling cause you kno what happpens. With Saraah the results just turn the opposite way :D

I dont know, I just had this massive urge to notify you guys that - you guys as in certain people ;)

boysboysboys (L)

Here are some of the many many photos from the Party on Saturday to celebrate their freaking 16th birthday ;D Im sure i've mentioned how much fun we had, because it was heck a lot of fun :D

The lovely birthday girls Anh Vo & Xuan Vo

Thai Trinh, Saraah, Bethany Freeman, Anh Vo & Klarysa

Kylie Huyng, Andrea Tran, Anh Vo, Julie Phan, Saraah, Xuan Vo, Thai Trinh & Nhi Nguyen

The lovely ass people that we're there :D Chinky asians!

*Asian smiles & camera clicks*
Xuan Vo: Open your eyes you bloooody asians :L

We had quiet a few debates on this one about our asian eyes, yes .. we have small eyes guys :D & boy is was truly asian invasion.

My birthday is in exactly eleven days and counting. But im pretty happy with myself because i now have finally gotten in all planned out about what im going to do to celebrate it. So now i've got to finalise everything and invitations and .. wait for the big day. My day of becomming that one year older and enjoying another year of life awaiting me.

I should be studying for my Math studies test, but yah know? Its school so ew :L I have double Maths tomorrow, Design and English. I havent caught up with reading yet so Annie is litterally going bash the shizzles out of me tomorrow .. but :P its only Annie. roffles

Lmaoo about today though, i fell asleep during Physics like i've mentioned before but then there i was trying to sleep, with Annie keep telling me to read Lord of the flies. So im sitting there half asleep with my eyes half open trying to read Lord of the flies while trying to pay attention into Physics.

im tired and restless but I litterally have to do well in the test because tutor will probably shove the whole textbook into my head if i dotn do well and so will certain somebodies not mentioning any names! *AHEM!

12.32am - goddamn i hate Maths in general. /fists. I feel like .. an icecoffee along with a piece of coffee flavoured cake with strawberry on top. mmm, how nice would that be like ;)

12.53am - just finished raging at Hoa, about a question I didnt get. Turns out i wasnt paying attention to what he was saying :L Geee, understand its late and im hungry and you tell me to think about Maths?!

1.30am - just about to head off to sleeep :D gooodnight bloggers and facebookers. sleep well and have a lovely day tomorrow

you know you love me. xo

what can i say? Anh knows me too well :L

What have you done to yourself?

Good afternoon yo ladies and gentlemans :D How have you all been? Came home around 3 today afterschool - thank god today was a Tuesday which means we start late and end early. I was practically sleeping through Physics, gossipping through Chem, and talking on the phone in Modern History :L What a good student i am aye?

I have a Maths Studies test tomorrow and boy am i not looking forward to it. I should really get a start on my Design and also get a start into reading my English book - cause you know? Im just four chapters behind everyone & also that my english workbook is so not updated?

I'll get to that later after i finish this blog. How have I been? Im not sure really - The most frequent question thats been on my mind alot has been

'Do i deserve this?'

Not in the 'what have I done to deserve this?' but in the .. Do I deserve to be treated so well. & there's this one particular person who knows exactly what im taking about (hush hush). Yes, i did promise not to bring up stupid thoughts but its a blog, this is where all my thougts go into so you cant blame me :P

Every decision you make helps Life lead you in different directions. I wonder, with my decisions that im making right now- where would it lead me? Where would i end to be?

Continue later, gotta eat Pho ;)

catch up with a hot cup of coffee

Where do i start? I guess my explanation for the lack of posts I've blogged has been because I was capped then i just couldnt be bothered getting on the comp anymore and then .. yeah till now :D I dont know what to say anymore, I've been through a lot. I realised that my last blog post was on February 2nd and today is February 21st. I guess, I mean so much has happened i dont know what to say or where to start about these things.

First fresh this first- Happy Birthday to dear ol' Anh Vo & Xuan Vo & Jennifer Tran for their lovely birthday yesterday. Hope they all had lovely ass times together. I was at Anh &Xuans' party yesterday. Despite the fact of waking up earlier then usual but still comming half an hour late and also the fact waiting for the freaking bus to come- everything else was beautiful and great ;D

We caught the tram to Glenelg to 'beach' it for a while (yeah, us black ass asians trying to get 'tanner' at the beach :L) I went pretty far out into the beach which was awesome (H) but then almost practically drowning according to two gay ass peoples! who intentionall saved me .. WHEN I KNOW HOW TO SWIM /shifty eyes :L

We then headed to Watermark to eat out and sang happy birthday and had a lovely time together. Headed back to the beach and chilled out (;D) Though mum told me to be home at 3.30 I intenally didnt arrive home to around 6 :D .. on time much Sarah? Surprisingly my mother was awesome about it and didnt mind!

School dragged out and along as per usual and now at the mention of homework and assignments came tagging along behind it ... so yes i've been pretty sad but a good girl and did my homework.

Formal's comming up, though its like another 9weeks away including Holiday weeks. but who's excited? I'll start blogging as per usual again and hopefully remember things that took place so i can blog about it. but now its math studies time.

Heading off and seeing you guys later.

you know you love me, xoxo

-dedicated to Annie Pham

Haha, now she's just gonna bash the snitzzls out of me :L

our time together is never just quiet enough

I feel as though today was rather quiet a depressing day. I mean thinking back, there's nothing to be depressed about but Im not as happy as my usual self - Im not happy chappy atm like i should be; and yes, I should be doing my Physics but meh, stuff it .. for now :L

In classes today especially English, I sat next to Annie and continuely singing the FireFlies song from Owl City. I swear she was so annoyed that any minute more class extended she would've litterally bashed me down :L tank aye Annnnie? :D

We had extended form assembly today where we all gathered in the hall and yeah do usual things. We watched a slide show with alot of inspirational images and quotes along which made me draw that smile but i mean, maybe its because of the heat thats making me feel down and the fact we have to read and study from our Physics textbook at home makes my head turn light and drizzly :P .. anything to get away from Physics

I think i've began to start posting way too many boring ass blogs about schoool :( Which isnt goood. School Mass this sunday .. and boy oh boy am i not excited to be going along- haha! I might just turn ill at lunch time and head 'home'. :L but then again I have tutor is meh, lets see how it goes. Gee May - now you make me feel like Gloria Jeans Arnots Tim Tam :\ and yes Tinh, I do miss you boys ;)

Heading off now to freaking shove the Physics book into my head

seee you guys later!

FREAK sakes! My adorably dog Charlie just barked and it scared the shit out of me :)

your my angel and your my star, your my light shinning right through my mind

Just taking a little time off from my homework - and i guess the best way to do that is hop on blogger and do a little blog posting. Monday today, and Monday seems to always be my lazy day. Where i somehow creep off to sleep in class or ponder my thoughts else where :D & Yes, i know i shouldnt be doing that in school but .. you just cant help it ;)

What is there to say? School must have at least started for your schooolies out there - lucky people who start today compared to those who started last Wednesday. Ha! That must suck! It is now 10.34 and I am two questions off finishing homework. Well then why dont you just do it to get it over and done with!? - because mum has kindly asked me to help her with the dishes after homework is done because she sprang her arm today and kinda not be able to use it. I accepted like a good girl - but ew, i hate doing the dishes! :L

At this moment, I just want to stuff my head into some soft comfy pillows of mine and lay there. Push all school related things off and just let me lay there empty minded. -/sighh I miss my holiday nights of staying up late, occupying myself with movies and mates :(

Hoa is now eagerly pushing my to get on with my homewokr to get it over and done with so i think i better head off blogspot and continue with my boring ass homework. (Psh, dont worry guys - i'd choose you over Math Studies anyday ;) )

Goodnight & until next time
xo